Is it human nature or more of a female thing, or is it just me that struggles to accept a compliment? You know, when someone says "hey great dress!" and you're all "oh this thing? oh yeah it's just something old I had in the cupboard, you know nothing really special, I don't even know why I put it on today, and um oh wow look over there!"....? Please don't tell me it's just me >.< Lately, I've been having issues with people complimenting me on my physical progress and current journey that I'm on to complete Blackall 100 by just hiking. Yeah yeah, I know, tough life people complimenting you lol but I find it so hard that the moment someone pays me a compliment, I instantly try to diminish it and downplay whatever achievement it is that they're talking about. I'm either second guessing about what their true motive is for saying something (which sounds way more paranoid then what I mean it to sound - it's my good old friend Anxiety coming to town, why would someone be paying me a compliment??) or deeply embarrassed that someone has said something nice and genuine to me. I mean, without tooting my own horn, I have been smashing myself the last 6 months and am finally noticing the benefits, both in physical appearance and strength out on the trails. However, the first words out of my mouth when someone says "wow you look great! have you lost weight?" are something "oh really? um I'm not sure, yeah maybe I guess so...". Which is a) a lie, and b) undoes all my hard work and determination. I'll never be the person that responds with "f*** yeah I know I look hot as!" but a little bit of self confidence and backing would't go astray once in awhile. Just yesterday, I met up with some running mums for coffee after our morning session and one of them commented on how my body had changed since the last time they saw me and how she was impressed with what she sees me do in my #trxbosu challenge posts. I instantly wanted to downplay her comments, but against every fibre in my body, I took a deep breath and said "thank you". It doesn't sound like much, and I hope I didn't come across as rude, but it was a big step for me. A few of us got to talking about my current nutrition plan and my training plan, as well as the crazy ride I have been on to get to this point, and I instantly felt more relaxed as I was able to slightly deflect the attention from me to tangible objects. I find it much easier and less stressful talking about other people's work and achievements above my own lol As part of that discussion, someone asked how long I had been running for and when I went and looked back, I realised that April 2014 was the turning point and it's been a whirlwind experience since then. I've said it before, but I both credit and blame Running Mums Australia for setting me on this current path. Such an amazing, inspirational, influential group I have ever come across in such large scale numbers. I could barely run 10km and then would read posts about someone achieving their first half marathon after never running before and I thought "damn if they could do that, then maybe I could too??", then the same thing happened to motivate me to run a full marathon, and then one of my beautiful crew besties was the one that introduced me to the world of ultra trails. And once you've done 50km, how much further could 100km be right?? Right???? Oh god, please tell me I'm right and it's not much further! Anyway, I'm not really sure what the point of this post was, or where it was going. I kind of got distracted half way through with booking accommodation for UTA2017. Which is obviously what I should be doing when I'm currently unable to run AT ALL, book accommodation for another 100km ultra. Well played my #4220+6 crew, well played!!! My crew <3 #4220+6
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For those of you who have been reading my blog for awhile, you would know all about the ongoing knee battles I've had this year and how it flared up again last weekend during Coastal High 50. To say that I'm frustrated is a big understatement. It's maddening to continue to battle this inflammation, as it stops me from doing what I love. Which is running. The freedom of running; the endorphins that are released; the beautiful scenery out on the trails; the fabulous company or even the blissful alone time. I love it all and am addicted, and like any good junkie, I'm hanging for my next fix!
So 2 days after Coastal High, I went back to Dave my physio for some treatment and a heart to heart. After sticking billions of needles into me (at least 8!) we got onto the subject of Blackall 100, which I am signed up to race on 22nd October. This year. Yes, in 6wks. 100km, when I am currently unable to run 1km. Good times. Dave asked me what I wanted to do. I laughed and said "what do you think?" to which he replied "I thought so!". He knows me so well lol Dave said that he thought I had 2 options: 1) try to let me knee rest and recover and then attempt to run Blackall. 2) pull out this year and try again next year. Now, never being one to walk away from a challenge, I posed a 3rd option - hike the whole 100km. "Interesting. I'm listening" said Dave. I explained how strong I felt out there during the race last weekend, especially on the uphills where I was easily passing people consistently even when hiking the hills, and received a lot of comments and compliments out there about my strength and pace whilst doing so. Until my muscles started to cramp and spasm, my knee never hurt from hiking and if it wasn't for the obvious pain in the knee, I had felt strong enough to have kept going when I finished. When I looked at my splits in Strava, they were pretty consistent and close to what I would have done had I been able to run more anyway. Dave thought about it and then told me that he thought that would actually be a really good alternative. By taking the pressure of trying to run on my knee (and the inevitable disappointment that would come when it started hurting again) out of the equation, I could actually use the opportunity to practice and experience the other components that form part of a 100km ultra. Learning to continue on through exhaustion and going overnight when all my body will want to do is sleep. Practising different forms of nutrition and learning to listen to my body about what it needs/wants. As he said, what you have at 10hrs will be completely different at 18hrs. I will also need to toughen up my feet and learn to strap them to help prevent blisters, as I only get blisters when I hike for long distances (but not running, 'cause I'm weird like that lol). He told me about when he first started to do ultras, plenty of people around him would hike. And that 100km is 100km, no matter how long it takes. With such a generous cut off of 28hrs, I wouldn't have any pressures on me except those I placed on myself to finish. Then once I completed it and was able to experience some of what goes into a 100km, I would then take the rest of the year off to recover and then come back stronger again in 2017 to contest another 100km, this time hopefully running it. I quickly checked with my fabulous support crew that they were still happy to crew for me even if it meant being out there longer and they were, happy days. So, we have agreed on option 3. I will be 100% hiking the Blackall 100 in 41 sleeps. I am aiming roughly for 20-21hrs but as long as I finish within the cut off, on my own two feet, I will be so happy. Dave is developing a new hiking training program for me for the next 6wks and I will continue to incorporate my strength training and stretching into my training. They say it takes a special breed of crazy to run an ultra - I think I've just taken it up to a whole new level to want to hike the whole thing. That's fast walking people. I don't even like to DRIVE 100km, let alone hike it. Wait, what the hell am I thinking??? Why do I have to be so bloody stubborn dammit lol Hopefully I make it out the other side to tell you all about it, but either way it's going to be one hell of a day out! |
AuthorHi, I'm Rhiannon and welcome to my blog. I'm not an elite athlete and I may never win any races, but I'm a "real" runner, juggling work, family and life to achieve my running goals. Archives
October 2020
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