I'm sorry things have been a bit quiet around here as of late. It's kind of hard to write a running blog when you're not exactly running...
But not running has given me a lot of time to think (not necessarily a good thing lol). So why do you run? I've discussed it before, for me it's my happy place, my stress relief, my ability to be able to escape and do something just for me. So what happens when that is taken away from you? Often dark places and thoughts. My psychologist has long said to me that I need to find something else that fills that void for when running isn't an option. Just recently, she told me that rather than connecting with the activity of running, connect with the values that it represents instead so that even if I am physically unable to run, I can still connect with the core value and have my needs fulfilled that way instead. I thought hard about that, what value/s did running represent for me? Health and fitness, freedom, personal identity? What else could I do to fulfil those values? everything I thought about came back to running. Ugh, try harder Rhiannon! I realised that I have been thriving on my weight training, both in my PT sessions with Drew from PT Direct 2 U, and my training sessions at the gym. The last time I set foot in a gym beyond the fitness classes I was in my early 20s and lifting teeny tiny weights. But already, I am starting to see some awesome gains and my core strength is significantly improving. I get an inner glow and sense of pride each time the weight it a bit heavier, or I try a new complex move. I feel the endorphins kicking in after waking up at stupid o'clock when I finally see some new muscle definition in the mirror. My confidence is lifted when Drew comments on my good technique. Having started the long process to reintroduce running back in after injury, I am already recognising the benefit that the weight and strength training is having on my running. For so long, I felt like I was just someone's mum, someone's wife, a co-worker, a friend, and didn't really know what there was for me in the world. Along came the opportunity to start my blog, and suddenly I felt like I gained some of my identity back. I felt free to be able to write about what I wanted to without holding back. However, along with that came new found insecurities as the inter web can be a scary and mean place. What if they didn't like what I wrote? What if I was boring? What if someone was mean to me or criticised me? Would I be strong enough to handle it? Recently I posted a pic of my "before" progress and I, no word of a lie, almost passed out from the anxiety of hitting POST. It's a scary thing to stand up and be real to the people in your life, its a whole other world of scariness to do that so publicly. My most recent exciting news is that I am a few weeks in to my official training program for Coastal High 50 and I am super pumped! I work so much better when I have specific goals in mind and a detailed plan to get there. Fingers crossed the next few months are uneventful as far as illness and injury goes, and I will be fronting up to race again much better prepared than last year. I've also got some exciting things in the pipelines that I hope to share with you all soon. So it seems as though I have been able to connect with those values that underpin my love for running. Kind of. Because all of those things are expressly connected to running. Whoops lol what can I say, I'm kind of a work in progress :)
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AuthorHi, I'm Rhiannon and welcome to my blog. I'm not an elite athlete and I may never win any races, but I'm a "real" runner, juggling work, family and life to achieve my running goals. Archives
October 2020
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REAL GIRL RUNNER | My Blog |